This is how the evening news should handle a story like this:
A little flashing red light and siren go off next to the news anchor and he frowns in disgust as he begins to explain what’s going on: “ Jig Alert! Jig Alert! There has been yet another random act of brainless nigger violence in Long Beach today and police are looking for what could easily be mistaken for two escaped zoo creatures. Police are interested in speaking with Kelvin Moggs , 23, of Compton and Tyqwondre’ “Chill” Stimmson, 30, of Hawthorne regarding a botched drive by shooting in which 3 year old “Christian Whittaker was hit by a stray bullet that had barely missed its intended target— which was Enwerd Buggs, 41, an affirmative action abuser and affordable housing recipient who sadly lives just 4 houses away from the Whittaker residence in this nice, quiet Long Beach suburb. Here is a pic of Bugg’s cheap housing equity bullshit home: look at it. Just look at it. Lawn hasn’t been mowed in at least three months . There is shit all over his lawn. Some is dog shit. Some is cat shit. Birdshit . Probably even some homeless people shit in that pile.
In fact, Mr. Buggs was ducking behind some tall grass and a turd pile when the shots began firing and he got through the attack unharmed.
The same cannot be said of little Christian Whittaker. Here is Mr. Whittaker : ‘Mr Whittaker, how do you feel about what occurred today ?
‘Well, first I want to let everyone know It Was Niggers, just like the drive-by incident last week that killed Mrs. Reed, who had just retired as a librarian at the college last month. I demand that this equity housing stops, and stops today.
If Mr Buggs wasn’t here NOT mowing his lawn, my son would be alive right now. I want these two troglodytes who shot my boy to hang from that tree right over there… it’s bigger than my tree. I want to throw a big block party for the event as well. It will be called a “No More Niggers Party” … and no one will even be allowed to WEAR black. The only black thing in sight will be their two stinking corpses dangling from that tree, as people dance below and vultures circle above waiting for something to eat. I want those bodies to hang there for one week, as a message to any other uppity spooks who might be thinking of stepping into THIS “hood”. I have three words for any jig who is feeling like giving this place a shot: DONT DO IT!
You can Think about it ; but DOn’T do it! Thank you.’
And in other news, a Nike Store just a few blocks from here was robbed but no desCRIPtion has been given yet of the perps. Oh wait! Yes it has. During that last sentence I just said. It’s enCRYPted in there somewhere . Time for a commercial break…”
